Catfished....?

Hello everyone! Today's blog is going to be about an interesting topic that is just now becoming widely discussed in the forefront of popular culture... getting catfished!

Just in case you have never heard of this term catfish, according to Urban Dictionary, "A catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they're not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances." Therefore, if you are someone who has been deceived by a false online identity, you now join the ranks of the many disappointed people in the world that can label themselves as being catfished.

So one might ask, why does this deserve an entire blog today? For one, I myself was the victim of forming a relationship with someone fake that I met online. Don't worry, i'll share the details later. Secondly, it's becoming a big topic in the wake of the Manti Te'o girlfriend hoax, if you haven't heard about that just google it. Last but not least, to shine a light on the many sneaky impostors that still roam the webs today and may be deceiving you or someone you love!

So yes back to me and my experiences with "catfishing". Throughout my teenage years I was among the few socially challenged individuals who instead of going to public school, chose to receive my entire education at home. Yes you read correctly, at home; that means there were no proms, no jocks, no crowd of friends or bullies to impress. Just me, my family, and unique coursework designed by my scarily intelligent mother.

This made me turn to many social media outlets for friends as my super social personality could not handle being alone. Well one day after my family decided to move to Oklahoma,  I was bored and even more alone than usual (you'd have to go to Oklahoma to understand the boredom I felt..) I met a girl online by the name of Renee (Yes, that is the actual picture of the girl I believed I was talking to below).

Me and Renee had an on and off relationship, we talked on the phone, exchanged stories, provided support for each other through personal problems in life. Basically we became best-friends.. or so I thought. After four years of talking to this girl, one day (I don't know if it was guilt, drugs, or wanting to do the right thing) she texted me a message that turned my world upside down. She told me that she was using fake pictures online, and that this was her real picture (I don't have her real photo any more but lets just say she was 'slighty' heavier set than the girl above).

I always had my suspicions about her, whenever I would ask her to text me a picture she said "oh my phone doesn't send pictures." Looking back, I was pretty stupid to believe her many excuses for not validating her identity. But I really wanted this person to be real, after all the moments and conversations we shared, I could only hope that someone I considered a friend would be honest to me. Unfortunately that was not the case.

Needless to say I broke off all contact with this girl, not only because of her picture which played a 'huge' part (no pun intended), but because she betrayed my trust for so long... and as a result of that breach in trust I lost a really close friend that day. It took me a while before I recovered from her deception and it completely shattered my confidence in online relationships. To this day I have a very low level of trust for people that I meet on the internet and instead of being "innocent until proven guilty" they are "fake until proven real."

Hopefully after reading this blog and my story you now have a greater understanding of "catfishing" and how harmful it can be to a persons psychological and emotional state. If you or someone that you know is in a relationship online and experiencing similar issues to the one I had with Renee, please don't continue to be deceived. Look into learning their true identity because honesty matters in a relationship. If someone can't even tell the truth about who they are, what else will they lie about?

One motto that I will use to define whether an online relationship is real or not is "If it seems too good to be true, then it usually is!"... Time to put those dirty catfish to shame!

Until next time, Adios!